The Bow Group and a topical fairy story


           Last night I was the guest speaker at the Bow Group’s Christmas drinks. I told them a short European fairy story about countries that wanted to share a currency with each other. I will write it out  nearer Christmas for this blog. It has either a happy or an unhappy ending – you can take your pick. You might like to think up your own ending for your contributions.

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  1. Posted December 16, 2011 at 8:26 am | Permalink

    Here’s a version of that for the 2-4 age group.

    It makes me laugh.

    • Bazman
      Posted December 16, 2011 at 1:31 pm | Permalink

      The Simpsons and the perfectly subversive South Park, also do and excellent job.

      • Posted December 16, 2011 at 5:02 pm | Permalink

        Links please Bazman?

        • Bazman
          Posted December 16, 2011 at 11:03 pm | Permalink

          Seems to work,

          • Posted December 17, 2011 at 8:07 am | Permalink

            🙂 I am not watching all 15 series of South Park Bazman!

        • Bazman
          Posted December 16, 2011 at 11:13 pm | Permalink

          I love the episode Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment. The exact argument for prohibition is used against prohibition.

    • Richard
      Posted December 16, 2011 at 2:43 pm | Permalink

      Thanks for your link Rebecca,
      It may be written for young children, but it it has a real message for us all especially in this time just before Christmas.
      And its funny.

      • Posted December 17, 2011 at 8:15 am | Permalink

        🙂 Kids programs and films are amazing – each of our children has their own complete new set compared with the last and they just get better and better. The latest generation seem to have included the pantomime element of appealing to all ages on different levels without losing all the relevant educational stuff for little ones.

        I go to see kids films at the cinema which I think I’ll hate (including scary propositions such as smurfs) and they’re excellent.

        And the quality of early years and primary state education in many areas inspires me too. That’s not meant to be a criticism of the secondary education!

        I look forward to hearing John’s story.

  2. Brian Tomkinson
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 8:55 am | Permalink

    I should think it will be a riveting tale; but why did you start half way through the story? Surely it began when once upon a time there were European countries who wanted to create a new country called Europe and in the process remove the democratic rights of the people who live there.

  3. ian wragg
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 9:57 am | Permalink

    And they all came to Westminster and asked if they could join Sterling.

  4. Atlas
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 10:48 am | Permalink

    … and who is playing “Widow Twankey” in this comedy of errors?…

  5. Electro-Kevin
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 11:14 am | Permalink

    Goldilocks and The Three Bears sums it up best for me.

    Instead of running away she continues to eat the porridge in defiance while the bears plead with her that it is theirs and that she is wrong to do so. By the time they’ve made their case the porridge is all gone and they just shrug their shoulders and say “Oh well. That’s the end of that then.”

    This is exactly how it has been with our democracy. While we express grave doubts about what is being taken away do they suspend proceedings and review the situation ? No. The ratchet gets ever tighter. The money and the power keeps getting sucked out.

    Too boring and unfunny for an after dinner speech ?

    Well I’m afraid ‘boring’ and ‘unfunny’ has been the EU’s greatest weapon.

    After all a fairy tale is not meant to excite people but send them to sleep. The EU certainly tries to do that.

    • Electro-Kevin
      Posted December 16, 2011 at 11:23 am | Permalink

      Attrition is the word I think I’m looking for.

  6. Steve S
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 11:57 am | Permalink

    While the authors were busy trying to write the ending using the font “fiscally united”, the whole thing blew up in their faces.

  7. Bill
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 12:06 pm | Permalink

    And all the countries of the British Commonwealth came together in a grand pact and decided to buy France.

  8. Posted December 16, 2011 at 12:27 pm | Permalink

    Thankyou for telling us that – it brings the very distant and unapproachable parliament near to us voters.

  9. Paul Margetts
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 12:39 pm | Permalink

    …. and the nasty ogre Dave, who everyone thought was against the euro, in the end did exactly what the other kings and queens wanted. He said he was very, very sorry for being naughty, and would not oppose them again and he gave away the keys of his pretty city to the ugly brother and sister, and all were left in fear and poverty.

    Try not to have nightmares children.

    Tomorrow night I will tell you the happier story of a band of heroic knights led by Daniel, Nigel, Bill, Norman, and John who put a spell on ogre Dave and sent him away. These brave men defeated the wicked kings and queens of euroland and set their people free to live again in freedom and prosperity.

    Sweet dreams

  10. RDM
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 1:18 pm | Permalink

    Maybe you should send a copy of it to those who hind within the WAG? In it’s self, a Horror story!


    There are very few Left-wing thinkers and Parliamentarians that inspire me, people like Noam Chomsky and the like, original thinkers!

    And there was no one more original then Chris Hitchens! RIP!

    I would consider both to be Libertarians, not Socialists or Left-Wing, but I would say that, wouldn’t I!



  11. Rodney Dawkins
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 1:40 pm | Permalink

    Not sure about this ‘thinking up my own ending’ business. Sounds a bit liberal. The concept, not the party. Obviously.

  12. Richard Jenkins
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 2:39 pm | Permalink

    A fairy story. Oh goody. Is it the one about Schnee Weiss and the 16 dwarves?

  13. john w
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 2:50 pm | Permalink

    John,i would like Ian Paisley and Bob Stewart to tell a nice horror story.A history lesson would do the trick.

  14. Richard
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 2:50 pm | Permalink

    We come bearing gifts for the new born king said the three wise men.
    The three wise men brought into the stable all their gifts:- gold, government bonds, and a huge pile of euros.

    Mary said,very nice of you all but just leave the gold.

  15. Electro-Kevin
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 3:01 pm | Permalink

    There is a Radio 4 docu-drama on at the moment about the bureaucrats who first concieved the idea of the EU. If this is a true account then it was most definately a federal construct from the outset and not a common trading area as sold to the British people. Also I am struck by the self-regarding way in which each of Jean Monet’s team of is described as ‘brilliant’ in the BBC narative.

    Why mention brilliance and why so much ?

    If you want advice on fairy tales, Mr Redwood, perhaps you should ask the BBC.

    • john w
      Posted December 16, 2011 at 9:30 pm | Permalink

      check out end game byAlex Jones and scare yourself silly

  16. Posted December 16, 2011 at 3:24 pm | Permalink

    What do you think John, Cameron as the Eurosceptic Man of Steel.
    Clark Kent changes into Superman – any Chance it will catch on!

  17. Jose
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 3:44 pm | Permalink

    I think who plays the characters could be ‘interesting’…how about Frau Merkel for Shrek and Sarkozy as Donkey….still thinking about Van Rompuy and Barrosso

  18. Posted December 16, 2011 at 7:22 pm | Permalink

    Alladin watched the strange man and woman calling out; ‘New cash for old!’ There were no takers though.

  19. uanime5
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 8:18 pm | Permalink

    How about a reference to the Grasshopper and the ant. While the grasshoppers called Spain, Italy, and Greece played throughout the summer the ant called Germany spent their time gathering food for the winter. When winter came Spain, Italy, and Greece suddenly realised they didn’t have any food, so decided to beg Germany to help them get out of the mess they’d gotten themselves into. Germany said okay but they had to do everything Germany said or they’d starve to death. Thus Spain, Italy, and Greece became totally dependent on aid from Germany.

    And the moral of the story is if you can’t run your own country properly someone else will run it for you.

    • lifelogic
      Posted December 16, 2011 at 8:51 pm | Permalink

      Italy may be in a mess, but I am not sure they are quite so desperate as to want German food yet.

  20. Jon
    Posted December 16, 2011 at 8:36 pm | Permalink

    A little pig decided to leave home one day, he waived good buy to his friends and trotted off.

    He picked up bricks as he went and built himself a brick … house, sat on the khazi smoking a cigar and reading the Sun.

    A nasty Big Bad Wolf came along and said Misure I will huff and puff and blow your house down.

    ..and little piggy said… p@ss off you french (wolf-ed) we left that basket case of a house made of straw!

  21. Bernard Otway
    Posted December 17, 2011 at 11:07 am | Permalink

    And all the New World countries planted 5 million EXTRA acres to Vine and the european wine industry was killed by the BIG BAD WINE WITCH

  • About John Redwood

    John Redwood won a free place at Kent College, Canterbury, He graduated from Magdalen College Oxford, has a DPhil and is a fellow of All Souls College. A businessman by background, he has been a director of NM Rothschild merchant bank and chairman of a quoted industrial PLC.

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